I’m now a Tesla Dipshit

V1.2

• Update: Managed to charge level 1 off my solar. But wires keep melting or things keep breaking. Or I have to prop the garage door open with an exentsion cord. Eventually I’ll get it going properly.

• Update: Finally found the cig lighter, 9 days later. That thing is so hidden. I was using slow charging on my phone but now I can do fast charging. The place where you lay your phone sucks because I have to take off my case to charge.
• Drove a week now. It’s so insanely fast. What you discover is that your fellow Tesla “pals” are all assholes. They drive slow as shit, hog the fast lane, don’t single. You’re on your own. You have nothing in common with them and they have no attachment to you. At least Subaru WRX people were friendly and pals.  A light was green and I boosted to make the light and this other tesla HONKED at me because they were mad I was going so fast. SO lame. It’s possible they were also just honking to save the dash cam which is also a feature.
• I still have no idea what is going and it will take me a while to learn.
• I hate the new designs for the 3/Y. They look so stupid. The better features are nice though.
• These things are fucking pod people cars. They have no personality and are like the government is picking what cars we have to drive in the future. They have zero personality.
• Made sure to get one where the person bought Acceleration Boost. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have the Full Self Drive System 4, only 3.
• I made the mistake of having sentry mode going in the garage for no reason. I used their new “low power” update and keep it in that but they won’t switch out of the mode once you start driving. You have to turn it off when you park and then turn it back on when you get home. You can add a shortcut on the app at least.
• The web browser won’t allow you to change the zoom or do browser plugins. I want something that reloads the browser.
• The insurance rates are terrible, specifically on Teslas. $1500 for just the car with multi-policy discounts while going outside of my 27 year insurance, they want 1600-4000 for just the car. WTF. My other 2017 vehicle is just $900.
• My kid couldn’t find the car in the parking lot because there were 50 other Teslas. haha. It’s great to blend in.
• I got charging to work in my garage at level 1. I charge from 9pm on for the cheaper electricity. I happened to get a new $280 charger.
• I’ve been working on my solar system to charge it but it’s completely fucked. It’s not charging the battery for some reason. I made the mistake of asking Grok how to fix my system. It found one broken part I removed and saw improvement but it said I needed to buy a new solar charge controller at $175. The new one has the SAME problem. So I think the first one wasn’t even broken. Don’t listen to AI, especially if it tells you to buy something. Us age 50+ people are idiots.

Original post: Got one for crazy cheap. 33k miles. 0-60 in 3.7 seconds. I had absolutely no idea how to even drive it. I tried to drive it away from the dealer and couldn’t because the keycard wasn’t in the center console and the app wasn’t transfered over yet. So I had to have some guy show me to put it there, then suddenly I could drive.

It’s not even performance and it’s still so fast you can’t control it. I just want to be somewhere and I’m instantly there. I can’t even imagine the performance one. I could have paid $1k more for a performance Y but they say the tires a way more expensive, and insurance and this one was fast enough. Also the wheels stick out more than the tires so they were all scratched up.

Looking right to the screen is weird. There’s so many controls and I have no idea what i’m doing. Tesla Newb. What I love about my old car is just knowing where every knob is.

DON’T LIKE

• Interior is so cheap feeling. It’s like a plastic nightmare. It’s like you go to the store in the 1980s and you see GENERIC ITEMS
• You can’t control the vent direction at all. I like one vent blasting toward my face. The air feels way crappier than my other car. It just shoots out and you can’t direct it.